07 Mar 2018

Smart Bomb – A Cure for Stupidity

We know about the nuclear bomb, the atomic bomb, and the photo bomb. However, there is one lesser-known, albeit groundbreaking bomb that was developed in one of the most secretive underground laboratory. Today, let's unveil the Untold History of the Cure for Stupidity – the Smart Bomb. 

In the 1950s, while most people were busy enjoying the peace of post-war living, opening their little shops and popping out their little babies, there was one man who was getting nervous about this situation; That man was Professor J.F., the infamous mad scientist. His radical thinking and experiments proved a phenomenon that, if not stopped in time, would pronounce certain doom for the human species. It was the fact that stupidity was contagious and spreading like wild gossip. 

Professor J.F. set his heart on finding the cure for stupidity, with something that could make anyone smart. With every fast-food restaurant that popped up in the neighbourhood, the mad prof tested a new chemical. With every lie that spread in the media, the scientist pulled a bunch of hair out in frustration. He worked tirelessly in his secret basement laboratory, frantically scribbling codes and formulae that only he could understand, in his tattered files and notebooks. The operation was top secret, and the Professor had only included his most trusted scientist partner, Dr. Jaxx, in the research process. Dr. Jaxx was also responsible for some of the most famous human experiments, one of which involved a Japanese hawker, some fried battered-prawns and radioactive liquids.

If any word of the experiment were to be leaked, the research would immediately be terminated by the top enterprises back then (the stupidity of consumers was the biggest driving force of their businesses), and the scientists would be facing jail-term for sure.

With simple baits of free food, the scientists managed to lure human subjects suffering from stupidity to their labs, and carried out their experiments. Nobody is certain what happened to these subjects but there were reports of mutated fighting apes appearing around the estate many years later. When the last subject, a dumber-than-average teenager who walked into the dim lab with his shades on, entered their experiment room, he tripped over some wires and fell right into a shelf full of dangerous chemical substances. Rows of flasks and test-tubes smashed onto the floor and BOOOOOOOM!

The explosion destroyed more than half of the laboratory's equipments and sent the boy into coma. The scientists were devastated! However, fate just wasn't a mathematical problem that any of the scientists could have solved. When the boy regained consciousness, he was a totally different person! He wrote down every chemical responsible for the explosion and his IQ was through the roof. With this information, ironically from an ex-idiot, the scientists had finally developed the Smart Bomb – the world's one and only cure for stupidity! And that, my friend, is the story of Smart Bomb.

Smart Bomb (Black) by Jason Freeny will be dropping this Saturday, 10 March, at 11pm (SGP) 10am (NYC) 3pm (LDN). Be sure to catch it!

(Disclaimer: The above story is 100% fictional and for fun, and does not intend to draw any reference to any specific person, dead or alive. Any similarity is purely coincidental)

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